Plog arrow Plog
"I shot an arrow into the air, and it stuck."
		-- Graffito in Los Angeles

Puniverse
Strange 2006 Stories
Woman Dies In House Clutter

A woman who was thought to be missing was found dead underneath a pile of debris in her home. Every room was crammed full of clothes, dishes and boxes from floor to ceiling with some areas 6ft deep. #

Man Gets Stuck In Washing Machine

An Australian man had to be rescued by the fire brigade after getting stuck in a washing machine whilst playing a game of hide 'n' seek. It took an hour to free the man. #

Man Mummifies Mother In Cupboard

An Italian man kept the mummified mother in a bedroom wardrobe for three years until it was found this week. When the woman dies back in 2002, her son stashed the body away in a wardrobe and sealed it with silicone gel. #

Man Stabbed Parents Because They Wouldn't Drink His Soup

A Japanese man has been arrested after fatally stabbing his mother and seriously wounding his father. Apparently he did it because they wouldn't drink his soup. #

Spider Nests In Woman's Ear For 27 Days

A Swedish woman has discovered a spider that had been living in her ear for 27 days! The small black spider probably crept into the woman's ear whilst she slept and set up home. #

Racist Man Sentenced To Attend Black Church

A judge has sentenced a man to attend services for six weeks at a black church for threatening to punch a black cab driver and using racial slurs. #

Embryo Removed From Man’s Back

A 35-year-old tractor operator underwent surgery to be relieved of what had initially been diagnosed as a tumor, but turned out to be the embryo of his unborn twin brother. Doctors said the embryo belonged to the patient's unborn brother who had spent 35 years in the body of the patient. #

Calf Found Buried Up To Its Nose

A group of rabbit hunters stumbled upon a cow in distress and one of her newborn calves buried up to the tip of its nose in the ground. The newborn had evidently been born breech and slipped backward into the hole immediately after birth. #

Man Throws His Legs At State Trooper

A drunk man who was stopped after driving the wrong way on a motorway decided to throw his prosthetic legs at the police officer that stopped him. One missed him but the other hit the trooper in the chest. #

Man Killed By 'Flying Dog'

A dog has apparently killed a driver after it fell from a freeway overpass and crashed through a car windscreen. It is believed that the 60-70lb labrador fell form the overpass and was not thrown. #

Disabled Man Slashes Throat Of Illegally Parked Driver

A motorist had his throat slashed by a disabled driver after he parked in the wrong bay. David Williams, 49, launched the attack after he could not find a space in a Tesco car park. #

Teen Beats Up His Grandmother Because She Won't Buy Him Beer

A 16-year-old boy has been arrested after he beat up his grandmother for not giving him $100 to buy beer. #


February

Burglar Gets Stuck in Oven Vent For 6 Hours

An alleged burglar was rescued after he got stuck overnight in the oven vent of the convenience store he was trying to rob. He broke in at 2am but wasn't found by employees until 8am. #

Man Coughs Up Nail 35 Years After Accident

In 1970, a bizarre gardening accident embedded a small nail deep inside Guy "Bud" Hart's body. More than 35 years later, the nail made an unexpected return, when he coughed it up. #

Doctors Mistakenly Cut Off Man's Leg

A man whose leg was amputated after a consultant wrongly diagnosed a bone disease. A bone-scan showed that the man did not have the disease but his leg was still amputated. #

Jailed For Life For Throwing Slipper At Judge

An Indian judge has sentenced a robber to life imprisonment for hurling a slipper at him. Apparently this is not an uncommon occurence. #

Man Eats 50-Year-Old Chicken

Les Lailey celebrated his golden wedding by eating tinned chicken that was fifty years old. He tucked into the meat — given to him as a wedding present in 1956 — without even cooking it. Apparently it smelt good and tasted alright. #

Woman Resuscitates Chicken

A woman saved a chicken by giving it the kiss of life. Marian Morris, resuscitated her brother's pet chicken Boo Boo after it was found floating face down in the family's pond. The chicken made a full recovery. #

Woman Owns 104-Year-Old Chocolate Bar

A woman says she owns a 104-year-old bar of chocolate. Jane Marshall was given the bar of Cadbury's by her grandad when she was nine. The chocolate bar was made to celebrate Edward VII's 1902 coronation. #

Teacher Ordered Pupils To Lick Floor Clean

A Russian teacher faces two years in jail after ordering her students to lick clean the floor of a classroom. The female teacher forced all her male pupils to lick up all the marks and stains on the floor. #

Boy Tumble-Dried By His Brother

A seven-year-old boy survived after being tumble-dried by his brother during a game of hide 'n' seek. The boy suffered slight burns. #

7-Year-Old Girl Marries Dog

A 7-year-old girl wed a stray dog as part of a ritual to ward off the "evil eye" on her and her family in eastern India.#

Woman Stabbed Husband For Refusing Sex

An Argentinian woman has been arrested for stabbing her husband because he did not have sex with her. The 52-year-old, from Buenos Aires, stabbed her husband in the back but he was not seriously injured. #

Man Kills Roommate Over Toilet Paper

A man was accused of fatally beating his roommate with a sledgehammer and a claw hammer because there was no toilet paper in their home. The man was beaten so badly he had to be identified through his fingerprints. #

Village Flooded By Liquid Pig Manure

A Bavarian village was flooded by liquid pig manure after a tank containing the fertilizer burst. Sewage rose to 20 inches in the courtyards and streets of Elsa after gushing from the tank, which held some 240,000 litres of pig manure. #

Sudan Man Forced To 'Marry' Goat

A Sudanese man has been forced to take a goat as his "wife", after he was caught having sex with the animal. #


March

Corrie Drew opened her curtains in her bra and knickers to find a man fixing a CCTV camera two feet from her bedroom window. It was installed to monitor yobs and because of its design, you never know if it's looking at you.. #

A couple and their three-year-old son were attacked by a 20-inch rat as they slept in a hotel room. The rodent first sank its teeth into little Cameron Harris’s neck. Then it bit shocked dad Steve — before going for his wife Hayley. #

Man Stored Wife In Freezer

A devoted husband could not bear to be parted from his dead wife — so he kept her in the freezer. The man kept her in the chest freezer for 12 daysuntil the alarm was raised by worried family. #

Man Admits Urinating On Toddler

A man who urinated on his toddler daughter plead guilty to one count of child cruelty whilst in court. The man urinated on his 15-month-old daughter while she was in her crib at their home. #

Teen Dies After Sword Falls Off Bedroom Wall

A teenager died after he was slashed by a sword that dislodged from the wall of his bedroom while he was playing ball with his siblings. #

Nipple Pincher Gets Juvenile Detention

A teen who pinched and twisted another boy's nipple while standing in line at a deli was sentenced to four days in juvenile detention. #

Erection Keeps Burglar Out Of Jail

A German burglar has escaped a prison sentence - because he suffers from a permanent erection. #

Dog Nearly Bit Off Man's Penis

A German man playing with his brother's Jack Russell was hospitalised after the dog sunk its teeth into his penis. #

Man Saved By Pigeon Poo

A man who plunged 30ft down a mill chimney survived — by landing in 6in-deep pigeon poo. He would have died but for a soft landing in a thick covering of pigeon droppings that built up over the years. #

Drag Queen Robs Petrol Station

A man's pantyhose led to his arrest, authorities said. An unshaven man wearing a black evening gown, fishnet stockings, calf-high boots and a black wig robbed a USA Gas station. #

Boy Gets Stuck Inside Toy Machine

Firemen had to rescue a 3-year-old boy after he got stuck in a toy vending machine. Initial attempts to rescue the boy failed when the boy refused to come out the machine. #

Moose Lands In Front Seat Of Car

A 500-pound moose crashed through the windshield of a car and ended up sitting in the passenger seat with its head sticking through the glass. The mosse was later euthanized because of severe injuries #

Woman Called Police Over Hubby's Porn Habit

A frustrated German housewife called police because her husband would not stop watching porn movies. #

Teacher Bought Porn For Students

An high school teacher is accused of buying X-rated videos for students. The Spanish teacher is accused of buying pornography for two male students at the school. #

April

Russian Girl Survives After Maniac Kicks Nail Into Her Head

A 17-year old girl from Russia has survived an extremely brutal attack from a man who kicked a 10-centimeter long nail into her head. The girl not only survived the attack, but managed to walk 3 kilometers the nearest police station, though she fainted as she came in. #

Aggressive Goose Attacks Toy Store Shoppers

Police in Cherry Hill, N.J., were forced to tape off a section of a sidewalk outside of a toy store after residents reported being attacked by a goose. Since the goose has begun sitting on the toy store's roof, employees have been escorting customers to their cars. #

Disgruntled Milkman Put Dog Poo In Cartons

A milkman fed up with working long hours put dog excrement in cartons. All were found by staff before being loaded for delivery. #

Cut Off By Floods, Man Survives On Frogs

A Czech man ate frogs and other small animals for four days after he was trapped on an island cut off by flooding. #

Hooker Bites Penis For Non-Payment

A hooker who bit her client's penis reportedly so hard that he required an operation has denied grievous bodily harm with intent. #

Librarians Ban Visible Underwear

A Swedish school library is refusing to lend books to pupils if their underwear is showing. Children who wear hipsters which show off their underwear are not allowed to borrow books. #

Drunk Broke Into Flat To Cook Pork Chops

A New York state man has been arrested for breaking into an apartment and cooking pork chops while drunk. #

Elderly Woman Ticketed For Walking Too Slowly

An 82-year-old woman has received a $114 ticket for taking too long to cross a street in the San Fernando Valley, Calif. #

Fisherman Blew Up Train

Russian fishermen accidentally blew up a train using dynamite they planned to use to help them catch fish. #

Driver Killed By Own Car

A woman motorist cheated death in a crash — only to be killed minutes later by her own car in a second smash. #

Pair Rescued From Quicksand Car

Two people had to be saved from a 4x4 when its wheels became stuck in quicksand as the tide advanced half a mile from the shore on a beach. #

Dog Hit By Propeller, Survives

Busterthe Jack Russell was hailed a miracle mutt last night — after surviving being hit by a plane’s propeller. #

Three-Year-Old Glued To Toilet Seat

A three-year-old required hospital treatment after becoming stuck to a toilet seat in a bowling alley which had been smeared with glue. The child was taken to hospital for a check up and made a full recovery. #

Surfer Blown From Wales To England

A windsurfer who went for a quick sail off the south Wales coast had the wind put up him when a gust blew him way off course and across dangerous shipping lanes. He was blown 68 kilometres from Swansea across the busy Bristol Channel to south-west England, dodging cargo ships as he breezed by. #

Man Burnt As Trousers Catch Fire

A man is being treated for serious burns after accidentally setting himself on fire. Police officers believe he set his trousers on fire while trying to light a cigarette. #

Man Crashes 33 Cars In 23 Years

A postman has finally learnt how to ride a bicycle after crashing 33 cars in 23 years. Croatian Franjo Pozgaj, 39, crashed his first car at the age of 16 and has wrecked at least one a year since. #

Woman Allegedly Smuggles Grenade Into Jail

A Salvadoran woman was detained after she tried to smuggle a military grenade and marijuana hidden in her vagina into the country's main prison. #

Prison Doc Fired for Sleeping With Inmate

A psychologist with the Arkansas Correction Department has been fired for allegedly having sex with an inmate. #

Man Survives 12 Nails To The Head

An Oregon man was found to have 12 nails embedded in his skill when he went to a hospital complaining of a headache. The nails were not visible when doctors first examined the man in the emergency room. #

Man Kills Mother, Grills Part Of Body

A Japanese man has confessed to killing his mother, dismembering her body, and grilling part of it on an electric hot plate after she nagged him about getting a job. #

Man Kills Self over Genital Size

An 18-year-old Singaporean student committed suicide last month because he was convinced his penis was too small. The report didn't say how big, or small, his penis was. #

Car Stolen With Pig in Back Seat

Call it a case of pignapping. Police found a missing potbellied pig in the back seat of a car that had been reported stolen. #

Man On Horse And Cart Escapes Police

A man on a horse and cart escaped four police motorbikes, a patrol car, a video van, two cycling constables and a helicopter. #

Ducks Banned From Pond

Ducks were banned from a village pond because they were deemed a menace by officials. The mallards had been eating the frogspawn. #


May

Chinese Woman Eats Dirt For 11 Years

A young Chinese woman underwent medical tests in Beijing after dining on dirt for 11 years. The 18-year-old from Inner Mongolia was taken to Beijing by her parents, who wanted to know why she finds dirt appetizing. #

Man In Dinghy Catches 9ft Shark

One of the biggest sharks caught off Britain was snared from a dinghy with a simple fishing rod. Peter Scott, 54, and Graeme Pullen caught the 9ft, 550lbs Porbeagle shark four miles off Bude, Cornwall. #

Teen Squirts Milk Through His Eyes

An Indian teenager has become famous for his ability to take in milk through his nose and to squirt it out of his eyes. #

Man Spends 50 Years In Tree After Row

An Indian octogenarian has reportedly spent half a century living in a tree after a tiff with his wife. #

Woman With Cough Has Leg Amputated

A mum went to her GP with a cough — and ended up having a leg amputated after falling victim to a killer flesh-eating bug. #

Bit of Finger Mistakenly Served to Diner

A diner found a piece of human flesh on his hamburger shortly after a restaurant worker accidentally cut his finger. #

Man Accused Of Putting Dog In Washing Machine

A 32-year-old man faces an animal cruelty charge after allegedly putting a dog in a washing machine and turning on the hot water cycle. The dog was later euthanized. #

Woman Sets Snake and Apartment on Fire

After being told by her apartment complex that it was not management's responsibility to remove a snake from her porch, a woman set the reptile -- and her apartment on fire. #

Penis Reattached After Maid Cuts It Off

Surgeons have reattached the penis of a Saudi man who paid the price for trying to have sex with his Filipina maid and she attacked him with a knife. #

Christian dies during attempt at 40-day fast

A devout Christian has died while undertaking a religious fast during which she only drank water. Rosaline Gilbert, 34, died 23 days into the 40-day fast. #

Deaf Dog Taught Sign Language

A deaf dog has been taught sign language in a bid to find him a new home. #

Dog Obese After Diet Of Beer, Donuts

An extremely overweight dog is being rehabilitated after being fed a diet of beer and doughnuts. #

Man Charged Iin Dildo Assault

A 37-year-old man was charged with a violent assault against his former girlfriend. He has testified that his only weapon was a dildo. #

Fart Causes Fiery End To Surgery

Flatulence is being blamed for bringing a hospital patient's operation to a fiery end. The man suffered minor burns in a brief but "dramatic" operating theatre fire. #

Men Accused Of Getting Puppy Drunk

Two men were charged of animal cruelty for allegedly forcing an 8-week-old puppy to drink vodka. #

Woman Accused of Taping Dog's Mouth Shut

A woman found a unique way to teach her dog not to bark. The problem: it's illegal. "I think she duct taped her mouth so she wouldn't bark," said Laurie Patrick, a kennel manager. #

Thieves Steal Rollercoaster

German police officers are asking for help in tracking down thieves who stole an entire rollercoaster. The 20 ton big dipper, worth more than £13,000, was stolen from a truck that had stopped at a car park. #

Man Steals Neighbour's Front Yard

It was a sod story for a Mojave Desert homeowner whose entire front yard -- grass, bushes and sprinklers -- was hauled away by a thief. The homeowner telephoned deputies to report that the yard in front of his home, which is under construction, was gone. #

Woman Accused Of Cutting Off Husband's Testicles

A woman in Philadelphia was arrested after allegedly cutting off her husband's testicles while he slept. The woman told police that she caught him cheating on her so she took action while he was asleep. #

Man Severs Penis To Prove Faithfulness

A man who apparently severed his penis in an attempt to convince his wife that he was faithful to her was recovering after surgery to reattach the organ at a northern Malaysian hospital. #


June

Man Water-Skis Behind Cruise Liner

A German man water-skied behind a cruise liner to win a bet. The stunt was recorded by a German TV show after a viewer wrote in disputing an earlier claim on the show that it would be theoretically possible to water-ski behind an ocean-going cruise ship. #

Sheep That Thinks It's A Sheepdog

It's a dog's life for Rolo the sheep - and she's loving every minute of it. Ever since North Wales farmer Emlyn Roberts saved her from death as a lamb, he has raised the Welsh cross at home with his sheepdogs. #

Man Stuck In Mud For More Than A Day Saved

A man stuck up to his waist in a muddy riverbank for more than a day was rescued Monday after he was spotted by a passing fisherman. #

Father 'Sells' Twins For 85p Bus Fare

A penniless Indian father gave up his two new-born twins for the price of a 100-rupee (85p) bus fare home because he was unable to care for them. #

Zambia Sentences Briton To Hard Gardening

A Zambian magistrate has sentenced a British businessman to 15 days of tending flowers at the immigration department for overstaying his visa. #

Lioness In Zoo Kills Man Who Invoked God

A man shouting that God would keep him safe was mauled to death by a lioness in Kiev zoo after he crept into the animal's enclosure. #

Real Body Found At Fake Crime Scene

Truth proved to be stranger than fiction for a high school criminology class investigating a fake crime scene when the students discovered a real body during a field trip. #

Man Hands Over Wife To Pay Debt

A Romanian man has handed over his wife to a creditor as payment for his debts. Emil Iancu, from tIghisu Nou, gave his wife when he turned up on his doorstep to collect a £1,800 debt. #

Man Stabbed After Argument Over Arguments

A 54-year-old male was stabbed once in the stomach and once in the chest last night after an argument in an alley. Police reports indicate the two men started arguing about not having an argument. The victims injuries are not life-threatening. #

Bulky Man Barely Injured As Car Rolls Over Him

A 440 pound German man discovered that being overweight can be good for your health -- if you get run over by a car. German police said the extra body mass prevented the 30-year-old man from suffering potentially fatal injuries when a Volkswagen Polo drove over him after he braked suddenly on his bicycle at a crossroads and fell off in front of the car. #

Passenger, 98, Made To Pay Full Fare

A 98-year-old bus passenger had to pay full fare - because the driver refused to believe he was a pensioner. #

Speeding Man Was Drying Wet Car

Police confiscated the car and driver's license of a Dutchman caught speeding who said he only wanted to dry his car after he had washed it. #

Police Chase Grandma Driving a Golf Cart

A 72-year-old grandmother driving her golf cart led police in tiny Tilden, Ill., on a low-speed chase through town. #

Teen Burns Down House Over Test Grades

A Japanese boy burned down his home, killing his stepmother and two younger siblings, for fear his parents would find out he had lied about his score on an English test. #


Got Change?

Bohemian Phrhapsody
By Hand

Did You Feel That?
Around 10:17pm, Aug 12th 1876, "Cellphone time" I felt a subtle sway going on it lasted for about 5 seconds. The wife was oblivious as the water would absorb the effects of the quake while soaking in a hot, luxurious essential oil, feta cheese, goats milk and pork dripping bath.

The Pacific Tsunami Warning Center in Hawaii initially placed the strength of the earthquake at 7.2 on the Richter scale and said it was centered at a few miles off Taiwan’s southern tip. It said there was no threat of a Pacific-wide tsunami. Japan’s meteorological agency initially warned of a 3-foot wave heading for the northern Philippines but later said the danger had passed without incident, according to news agencies.

Local television stations reported that Taiwanese officials placed the quake at 6.7 on the Richter scale. The quake and a strong aftershock two minutes later, with an estimated strength of 6.4, were felt across the entire island of Taiwan. The quakes were unusually long, each lasting more than a minute, officials said.

A reporter’s hotel room swayed in Taipei, 200 miles from the epicenter, and the building creaked for 10 to 15 seconds during the quake and the aftershock. The hotel was not evacuated, and the streets were quiet and peaceful afterward.

The earthquake took place at 7:26 a.m. Eastern Standard Time on Tuesday, which was 8:26 p.m. on Tuesday evening in Taiwan.

The quake came on the second anniversary of the far more powerful one off Sumatra in Indonesia — estimated at 9.1 on the Richter scale — that triggered a tsunami up to 30 feet tall. That tsunami killed 230,000 people around the coastline of the Indian Ocean, most of them in Indonesia, and left nearly 2 million people homeless.

A Taiwanese official warned in a televised press conference on Tuesday night that there would probably be further aftershocks.

The earthquake took place close to Kaohsiung, Taiwan’s second-largest city, with a population of 1.6 million people. Calls to Kaohsiung could not be completed because phone lines were busy.

Taiwan lies in one of the most earthquake-prone regions of the world. A small earthquake a little after 1 a.m. woke some in Taipei on Sunday morning.

Text: NYTimes.com

Taiwan's High-Speed Rail gets The Green Light For January 1st 2007
But I won't use it until at least 1 year or 10 accidents into its service

President Chen Shui-bian personally urged yesterday the public to have faith in the country's soon-to-be inaugurated high-speed railway, one day after Premier Su Tseng-chang made a similar call and praised the bullet train following a test ride.

Chen made the appeal during a meeting held at the Presidential Office with a group of supervisory directors of three Taiwanese schools in Japan.

The president expressed hope the Japanese visitors would be able to travel by this new rail system to see whether it can compete with the Japanese Shinkansen system.

Noting that construction of the high-speed rail was conducted during his mandate, Chen hailed the system as a good example of the BOT (build-operate-transfer) model for costly public construction projects.

However, Chen urged rail system personnel to list safety as their highest priority.

THSRC chief executive officer Ou Chin-der confirmed the company received the green light yesterday from the Ministry of Transportation and Communications (MOTC) to begin commercial operations in 2007.

Ou said the company plans to offer a 50-percent discount price of NT$730 (US$22.30) for a one-way trip between Banciao in Taipei County and Tsoying in Kaohsiung city during a week-long trial period.

He added that the plan still requires the approval of the THSRC's board of directors.

The launch of the 345 km high-speed rail system has been delayed four times since 2003.

The MOTC gave the THSRC permission to begin passenger services amid controversy and claims by members of a safety inspection panel that the high speed rail system is unsafe because it still has many uncorrected operation defects.

The non-profit Consumers Foundation even urged the public to boycott the railway.

Foundation Chairman Cheng Jen-hung also said that THSRC offers unreasonably low insurance compensation for possible fatalities suffered in the rail system.

He noted that a passenger is required to pay a Taipei-Kaohsiung ticket price of NT$1,490, which is only slightly lower than the air fare of NT$1,970.

However, the customer gets only an insurance coverage of NT$2.5 million compared with the NT$13 million for taking airplanes, Cheng said.

At an interpellation session of the Legislative Yuan Tuesday, lawmaker Lai Shyh-bao of the opposition Kuomintang (KMT) asked MOTC Vice Minister Ho Nuan-hsuen why the MOTC had failed to let the public know whether the 33 faults reported by the inspection panel have been eliminated.

Ho replied that all the defects had been double-checked and that the MOTC will publicize all information on the Internet this week to let the public know how the faults have been corrected.

Another KMT legislator said that President Chen should move his family to Kaohsiung as he promised in Kaohsiung mayoral race campaigns and take the bullet train to work in Taipei.

Most people who are wary about the safety of the new rail system might want to the bullet trains after the president first takes a regular trial ride of six months, the lawmaker added.

Meanwhile, the National Police Administration's Railway Police Bureau indicated that it has formed a high-speed rail section consisting of 223 police, with 175 having already reported for duty. The remaining 48 will be recruited soon.

The 345-km railway linking Taipei and Kaohsiung is expected to reduce travel time between Taiwan's two largest cities to 90 minutes from the current four-and-a-half hours taking the traditional train service offered by the Taiwan Railway Administration.

The high-speed rail line traverses 18 counties and major cities and 68 townships in Taiwan's western corridor. The initial passenger services will cover eight stations: Taipei, Banciao, Taoyuan, Hsinchu, Taichung, Chiayi, Tainan, and Kaohsiung.

Text: China Post

Slow Motion Raspberry

Raspberry blowing captured on film at 500 frames per second. [via]


Toilets are terrible in Asia
But this experience has to be the worst...

A 27-year-old man was taking a train from Wuchang to Guangzhou in China when a little mishap caused him to drop his cell phone into the toilet bowl while using the toilet.Image

In a state of panic, he tried to fish it out but got his hand stuck instead. The attendants on board the train tried to free his hand from the compartment below for 3 hours but to no avail. It even got worse as his hand had now gotten deeper into the hole. As such, they had no choice but to stop at the next station to get some help.

Technicians removed part of the floorboard and the man was sent to the hospital with his hand still stuck. At the hospital, his hand was freed without further incident. By now, 8 hours had already elapsed. This poor guy must have suffered badly from both the pain and pungent stench! A total of 1,300 passengers were delayed for 5 hours as a result of this incident.Image

Link & Image: XinHua


James Brown & Charlie Drake - RIP
Two minor influences in my life, James Brown - "I Felt Good" and Charlie Drake "Hello Mr. Pugh", both died this Christmas....

Laura Bush On Cancer "no big deal"
"it's no big deal, we knew it wasn't a big deal at the time."

Wait until it travels to the bowel! - let's see dignity then.


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The web helps you collect that which has already been collected.

Someday man should learn how to enjoy liberty without license, nourishment without gluttony, and pleasure without debauchery. Self-control is a better human policy of behavior regulation than is extreme self-denial.

My jokes are so lame I shot my horse.