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I sold my memoirs of my love life to Parker
Brothers -- they're going to make a game out of it.
		-- Woody Allen

The Last Shadow Puppets - The Age Of The Understatement

The web helps you collect that which has already been collected.

Someday man should learn how to enjoy liberty without license, nourishment without gluttony, and pleasure without debauchery. Self-control is a better human policy of behavior regulation than is extreme self-denial.

My jokes are so lame I shot my horse.