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At no time is freedom of speech more precious than when a man hits his
thumb with a hammer.
		-- Marshall Lumsden
Howard Stern (NSFW)
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Someday man should learn how to enjoy liberty without license, nourishment without gluttony, and pleasure without debauchery. Self-control is a better human policy of behavior regulation than is extreme self-denial.

My jokes are so lame I shot my horse.