Plog 
PBrain Less Peas More Brains RIP
Safety Tips for the Post-Nuclear Existence
Tip #1: How to tell when you are dead.
(1) Little things start bothering you: little things like worms, bugs,
ants.
(2) Something is missing in your personal relationships.
(3) Your dog becomes overly affectionate.
(4) You have a hard time getting a waiter.
(5) Exotic birds flock around you.
(6) People ignore you at parties.
(7) You have a hard time getting up in the morning.
(8) You no longer get off on cocaine.
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As I laid my breakfast out onto the plate the bacon rashers paired as angel wings, and my toast had an uncanny image of a fallen pop star, with egg yolk runny.
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The web helps you collect that which has already been collected.
Someday man should learn how to enjoy liberty without license, nourishment without gluttony, and pleasure without debauchery. Self-control is a better human policy of behavior regulation than is extreme self-denial.
My jokes are so lame I shot my horse.
