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I don't want to bore you, but there's nobody else around for me to bore.
Porsche Trappistenkäse
The owner of this Porsche 911 was fed up with the constant repairs to his beloved sports car. Pity there's no rocket launcher!

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Someday man should learn how to enjoy liberty without license, nourishment without gluttony, and pleasure without debauchery. Self-control is a better human policy of behavior regulation than is extreme self-denial.

My jokes are so lame I shot my horse.