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Seeing a commotion in Harvard Square, a man strolled over and asked what
was going on.  One of the onlookers explained to him that there was a Mooney
who had immersed himself in gasoline and was threatening to set fire to
himself to demonstrate his committment to the Rev. Moon.  The man gasped and
asked what was being done to defuse the obviously dangerous situation.
	"Well", replied the onlooker, "we're taking up a collection -- so
far I've got two Bics, four Zippos and eighteen books of matches."

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The web helps you collect that which has already been collected.

Someday man should learn how to enjoy liberty without license, nourishment without gluttony, and pleasure without debauchery. Self-control is a better human policy of behavior regulation than is extreme self-denial.

My jokes are so lame I shot my horse.